This week was torture for me. My schedule has been crazy. I no longer have lunch with Meg, or the rest of the table. I mean the table I sit at now is great. All the guys. But there's something missing. Every lunch in the first semester was just kickass because it was so god damn funny. The level of weirdness at that table just plain blew my mind. I don't know about this new lunch setting. It's different.

Not getting to see Meg much this week drove me insane. I saw her once or twice a day. That kept me borderline sane. Last night was awesome. Just being with her, threw all my worries to side and helped me have some fun. So yeah, last night was great. I'm incredibly happy.

But this schedule change has taught me something. It has taught me to value every little second I spend with Meg. And I do.

Creative writing is actually pretty fun. I always have wanted to write in class and having write about something every day is actually helping my writing I think. I have strong feeling that Mr. Schmitz forgot send in my poem to that contest. Oh well. Mrs. Rogers told me that will be a contest in the spring. I'm quite sure to say whether I'll be writing less or more because of creative writing. I think I might be writing more, though. I learnt that to be a successful writer one must have self-definition. I find it hard to write about myself without sounding conceited, but can someone go through life without knowing who he or she was or who his friends and family were? I could ask people to define me, but then that wouldn't be self-definition, would it?

If there had to be a Webster's definition for me, it would go something like this. Sam Van Geison: a really shy, slow to trust, quick to anger, cautious, loving, caring, sweet, funny, weird, quirky, simple yet complex, modest and humble, forgetful, passionate, energetic, fidgety and just a nice guy.

I know that seemed rather conceited of me, but most of the time I just describe myself as a plain guy. That I am not. Now, my friends, I will end this entry with the first three words from my first entry that was a year ago.

I am Sam.

The Story of Meg and Me

Have you ever met someone and this feeling comes up? That instantaneous liking of the person. I really met Meg back at the start of school in lunch. Yeah, of course I knew who she was, but I really didn't know too much about her. Through the course of school and out of school, I got to know Meg better and she got to know me.

If there was a certain event that sealed the deal of my liking of Meg, it would definitely be Homecoming. I remember thinking that I wasn't going to go because I didn't have a date, but on the eve of Homecoming something changed my mind. Whatever it was, I'm glad it happened.

Homecoming was awesome, even though I had Pizza Hut for dinner, I have to say now that it ruled. I went with Heather, Erica, and Kelly, but I knew I wanted to find Ryan, Gregg, Bethany, and everyone else. I found them, and I was content. When Meg asked me to dance with her, I was more than happy to do so. I had a great time with her. Probably one of the most memorable nights of my life. When she left early, I remember being a little saddened. She said she'd be at Spencer's party. Since I was given an anytime curfew, I went there really to just see her. I mean I went there to see everyone else but she was on my mind the most.

I think that was the first time I had been at Spencer's. Probably the most memorable ever, too. I had a great time. I remember thinking about that is unbelievable how beautiful Meg looked, how nice and sweet she was, and how funny and quirky she was. Damn. She still is beautiful and cute, nice and sweet, and funny and quirky. When Spencer finally kicked the rest of us out, it was 2 am. I had my dress shoes on because I forgot to bring some regular shoes. Me and Meg said our good nights and she got in her car. I don't know what came over me, but as she started driving away I found myself running after her in my leather shoes. Now, it's not that easy to run in leather dress shoes because they don't bend like sneakers do. I remember her speeding up and turning a corner. I remember walking back to my car, getting in, and thinking,"Wow, that girl is great."

I slept more peacefully that night than I think I ever have. When I woke the next morning and went downstairs for breakfast, my parents asked about the night before. For a minute, I sat there, staring off into space. Then I looked at them and said, "It was fine." I smiled afterwards and thought "fine" is not really the adequate word for last night, numbskull. Blissful and perfect would be more exact. That night sealed the deal of my liking of Meg more than a friend.

I think it might have been a week or more later when Spencer pulled me aside in Consumer Ed class. He told me that Meg liked me and wanted me to ask her out. Spencer wanted to know what I thought and I told him to let me think about it. I had already been thinking about it. Thinking about it since the morning after homecoming. I knew I wanted to, but I'm shy guy, you see. Later on that week, I went and hung out with the group for the 2nd time. I think it was Andy, me, Gregg, Spencer, Bethany, Valerie, and Brittan. I'm pretty sure we rented and watched the movie "Orgazmo". Very funny movie by the way. I would definitely recommend you rent it. Anyways, while we were watching the movie, Bethany turned to me and asked me about what I thought about Meg liking me. I merely said I like it the idea. Even though I liked her a lot. For me, it's hard to ask a girl out. I mean really hard. Over the weeks, Spencer, Bethany, and Brittan were always asking me when I was going to ask Meg out. I told them before my birthday.

On the night of Elizabeth's Halloween Party, I went over to Meg's first. We talked for a while, then we watched Chicago. I wasn't feeling all that well. I completely destroyed a box of tissues. During the last period of the movie, Spencer called me asking where I was. I was supposed to be at Elizabeth's for the party, but I was having fun just being with Meg. When I left I thanked Meg for having me over, and putting up with me being sick. We hugged twice and I said good night. Had I not been sick I would have asked Meg out then and there, but I felt too miserable that night.

When I got over to Elizabeth's, the party was pretty much winding down. Niki, Elizabeth, and Spencer were on the stairs to the basement when I walked in. They asked me what me and Meg did. They joked and jeered with me a little, but I didn't really care. I just got to spend time with the girl I liked. Sick as a dog and as happy as a cat in a garden of catnip I was. Ironically, Sammy P. was there and she was sick as well." Two Sam's sick in same room is a bad thing," I thought. After a while, they gave me some drugs and I went home.

My birthday was coming up quick and I still hadn't asked Meg out." I'd better do this or I'm never going to do it at all." I thought. So on November 2nd, 2003, around 9:30 pm, I gathered my wits and my courage about me and dialed Meg's number. My stomach was instantly filled with butterflies. When she answered, I was almost about to hang up and forget, but I held on. I just small talked with her for a while. Then I just said," Meg, I really like you and I was wondering...if you would like to go out with me." I don't remember if these were my exact words or not, but after she said Of course, yes, yes, I remember being the happiest I'd ever been or could remember.

So 2 months and 2 days ago, I asked Meg out. It seems both like yesterday and years ago. One thing is certain, though. The amount of how much I like and trust Meg hasn't diminished. It has done the very opposite. It has grown. It has grown past the word "like." I have been in a couple of relationships before, but not one like this. Where there are days I can't stop thinking about her. From dawn to dusk, she is always on my mind For Christmas, I got her some things. I already gave her one of presents. It was my poem Days Have Gone By except I made the paper look old and bought a nice frame. What else I got her, you ask? I can't tell you that. It would ruin the surprise.

P.S. Don't forget to come back and read my other post below this one. I just woke up at 5:30 and had to type this. I'm done reminiscing for now. Well I got to go and watch Spiderman now.

Massage therapy is the most natural medicine known to mankind. Think about it. You hit your elbow on something, what do you do besides cuss up a storm? You rub your elbow. You ate too much, what do you do? Rub your stomach. It's quite natural.

Along with Val, I, too, want to become a massage therapist. I haven't thought about what college I want to go to, but then again I haven't really concluded if I want to be a massage therapist or not. It's definitely something I'm good at. It's really quite easy and natural for me to do. Plus, I enjoy doing it. It makes me feel like I'm helping somebody in a way. And the pay is quite great. Let me see, I like doing it and it pays very well. I think a wise man once said Choose a job you like and you will never have to work a day of your life.

I was talking with Val about it and she asked me where would I like to work? I definitely wouldn't like to work in a spa. When you work for a spa, your rate of pay is decided by the spa and not by you. In a private practice, however, you set your rate. I have considered working in a hospital for physical therapy. I would like to be able to set people back on their feet after an accident. I remember when I was little kid and tried in vain to save one of my favorite cat's life. But when you're a kid, you don't quite understand everything. Hell, I'm 17 years old and I don't understand much. Well, my mom took my poor cat to the vet. I didn't go with her. When she came home, she came home without him. I asked her where he was, and she just said" Sam, Rashad (my cat, interesting name for cat) had a broken spine. That's why he couldn't walk right. He probably got ran over. He was lucky to still be alive, but now Rashad is a better place, Sam." I remember that day. I remember that I bawled till I became dehydrated. I had tried with all my might to get that cat back on its feet. If I can get some people back on their feet and into their normal way of life, I would be more than pleased to do so.

I hear I am good at massage and I guess I must be. Every time I give someone a massage or a backrub, I feel as if some energy from my fingertips is flowing into that person. That I have, in fact, hands of healing. I can get rid of people's ailments and stress just by touch. That fact in itself makes me feel great. I haven't much practice lately. If you would like me to practice on you, contact me.